Chapter 9

Sam broke out through the mangroves and called out to Tara ‘Good morning, Tara, I made it’ she laughed breathlessly as she made her way down the muddy bank. ‘and look’, she added as she spun around slowly once she reached the water’s edge.
‘Good morning to you too. What am I looking at?’
‘My shorts, there’s barely a fleck of mud on them.’
‘Well done’ laughed Tara, ‘I see you’re getting more confident then at walking through muddy mangroves.’
‘Yep, I was pretty proud of myself getting in here without losing my way or getting dirty, especially considering that I swear the trail was much muddier than the last time we came here, or is that just my overactive imagination.’
‘Not at all. It’s actually a king tide at the moment, which means not only does the water go much further into the mangroves than normal, but the creek also runs itself almost dry at the other extreme of the tide.’
Sam suddenly looked around her, and noticed that there was barely any water in the creek. With less than ten steps, she could have easily made her way across to the other side of the water, the whole creek bed appeared to be one muddy channel funnelling the water this way and that.
‘Wow, who would have thought this was the same place you brought me last time.’ Sam mused. ‘And by the way, I also bought myself some fishing gear and a new backpack.’ With that, Sam hoisted her backpack off her back and set it down.
‘You didn’t have to do that’ replied Tara, ‘I’ve got plenty here you could have used.’
‘I know, but I am really starting to enjoy fishing, so I thought it would be good to have some of my own gear.’ She started unpacking the contents including a couple of hand lines, a small tackle box and a fishing knife. ‘I feel like a real fisher woman now!’
Sam paused then continued ‘But it’s all thanks to you. Thank you so much for inviting me along.’
‘Not a problem, and besides, it’s nice having someone to fish with. Especially since I can’t seem to convince Caitlyn to give it a go’
Sam pulled out some bait and cut a bit of squid off, then gingerly put it on her hook as Tara had taught her. She got up to throw her line in, but paused. ‘Is it even worth fishing at the moment with so little water.’
‘Mmmm’ reflected Tara, ‘well, I’m one of these people who enjoys wetting my line, even if I don’t get a bite for a while, so, I’ll always be inclined to tell you to throw your line in for the sake of it. I’ve been here for the past two hours, and I haven’t had a bite. But the tide has just turned, and it won’t be long before the creek starts filling up again. That’s normally when the fish start biting again.’
‘Well then, I’ll join in shall I.’ replied Sam, and she tossed her line out. Being the first cast she had done in a while, it went a bit astray, and landed ten feet away upstream at the edge of the water.
Seeing Sam’s embarrassed look, Tara said encouragingly ‘Oh don’t worry about that, just wind it up and try again.’
Sam did so and her next cast landed smack bang in the middle of the flowing stream of water. She set her hand line down and was about to head up the bank. ‘I’ll just head up and grab the crates for us to sit on.’
But Tara stopped her. ‘I wouldn’t worry about it if I were you. That water will start to come in pretty fast now, and we’re going to have to move ourselves progressively back up the bank every fifteen minutes or so. There’s no use getting too comfy sitting down.’
Sure enough, just over ten minutes later, the water was almost lapping at their feet, and the picked up their belongings and moved a few feet back. Just as they resettled, Sam felt a small tug at her line, but after a few bites they stopped again.
‘Give it a minute, the fish might come back’, said Tara.
Just then, Caitlyn came through the edge of the Mangroves. At first, Tara and Sam, called out hello without really turning around, because something was nibbling on Tara’s line this time, but ten seconds later, when they were sure the fish had stopped biting, they finally turned around and were surprised to see that Caitlyn was carrying a fishing rod.
‘My, my’ exclaimed Tara. ‘Are you planning to join us in fishing today?’
‘Yes I am, if that’s alright.’
‘Of course it is. What brought on your change of heart?’
‘And how on earth did you get through that trail, carrying a fishing rod?’ interjected Sam.
‘With great difficulty, but I got here eventually.’ Caitlyn laughed at her auntie and Sam. Their exuberance was refreshing. She didn’t feel like explaining her long sorry story about her failed fishing adventure at the jetty, so she decided to abbreviate her explanation. ‘I went fishing with a new friend last weekend, and I guess it finally sparked an interest in fishing.’
Sam jumped on her comments straight away. ‘Oooh, a new friend hey? And would this new friend be a male by any chance?’
Caitlyn blushed slightly ‘As a matter of a fact, he is a male’. As she tried to keep her head down so the others didn’t notice, she grabbed some bait and started to bait up her line.
However Tara didn’t miss much and saw her niece blush, so didn’t push her, but Sam continued to prod. ‘And would this male friend be young and good looking by any chance.’
‘I guess you could say that.’ replied Caitlyn, and her blush deepened.
Suddenly, Sam noticed her blushing and backed off. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said gently. I was only teasing. I didn’t mean to offend you.’
‘Oh no, I’m not offended. Thomas is quite nice, and we get along quite well. I thought it was very generous of him to take me fishing.’
Sam said very gently. ‘So is there any hint of romance then?’
‘I don’t know about that. I would be reluctant to jump too quickly into anything like that. After all, we have only just met.’ said Caitlyn as she cast her line out and sat down on the muddy bank holding her rod. Caitlyn had her oldest shorts on and didn’t care how dirty they got. She went quiet for a minute and stared out in the distance. Her eyes glazed over momentarily. Then she continued. ‘Last year at University, I was seeing someone called Ned. We were actually quite serious. We were all but engaged. We were meant to move to Kalgoorlie together at the beginning of this year to start our teaching careers together.’ Caitlyn paused again.
‘Yes, I wondered what had happened to Ned.’ Tara said quietly. ‘I thought things mustn’t have gone well, when I found out you had come to Broome, instead of going to Kalgoorlie. But I figured you would talk about it in your own time if you wanted too.’
‘Thanks Auntie Tara, and I did realise you would be a good person to talk to. But once I got here, I guess I just wanted to try and forget the whole ugly mess. That’s why I avoided talking about it. I think that’s also why I’ve been throwing myself into my school work even more so than usual. That way I was able to avoid even thinking about it.’
All three women sat silently for a minute before Caitlyn went on with a husky voice as she continued to stare out at the mangroves on the other side of the stream. ‘I thought I was going to marry Ned. We weren’t actually engaged yet, but we had talked about it, made plans, discussed having kids... I just assumed it was all mapped out.’
Tara could see that Sam was about to say something, so she reached out and laid her hand on Sam’s forearm, pursing her lips and shaking her head, to indicate that Sam should remain quite.
‘Then one day, one of my lectures got cancelled because the lecturer was sick. Ned had no lectures that day, so told me he would be studying at home. I thought I’d surprise him and go and study at his place with him. I arrived on the door step and used the key he had given me to let myself in. I snuck through the living area and went up to his bedroom. Just as I was a few steps from his door, I heard a female giggling. And to my horror, as a snuck a glance through the doorway, I saw them...’ Her voice drifted off. Sam couldn’t help but gasp, although she did so quietly.
Caitlyn paused again and took a long shuddering breath. ‘It was Barbara, my supposed best friend. I wanted to leave without them knowing I had been there, but as I backed away from the door. I tripped over Barbara’s backpack which she had left in the hallway.’
She still remembered Ned suddenly calling out ‘What the hell’ and racing out to the hall way with only a towel wrapped around his hips.
‘Of course he tried to stop me leaving. Barbara quickly got out, although she didn’t look like she felt too guilty. In fact I swear she was smirking as she left. Then Ned swore it was the only time, that he was sorry, and that he would never let anything like that happen again. But I ended it there and then. I wouldn’t return his calls, or agree to see him at all. I avoided him as much as I could at Uni.’
Again she paused ‘Then I rang the Education Department and told them I couldn’t take my first teaching post in Kalgoorlie. They told me there was little chance of getting another post with only a few months to go until the end of the year, all the positions elsewhere had been finalised. I told them that I would rather be put back on the waiting list and risk missing out on a job instead of going to Kalgoorlie. So that’s what happened. Like they warned me, nothing came up. It was just lucky that this job I have now appeared in the paper, and I was able to get it. Otherwise I might have ended up unemployed in Perth.’
‘Oh, I’m so sorry’ exclaimed Sam. ‘You poor thing.’
‘No, don’t feel sorry for me. I’m ok. It really was for the best. I’m glad I found out what Ned was like when I did, rather than after we moved to Kalgoorlie together, or heaven forbid, after we got married. And as for Barbara, well what can I say. Who needs friends like her? You know, I actually overheard her tell someone in one of the University Cafe’s that it wasn’t as if I had his wedding ring on my finger, so she didn’t see why she should feel bad.’
Tara went over and squatted behind Caitlyn. She wrapped her arms around her seemingly fragile niece and whispered in her ear. ‘It’s alright my precious one. You’ll be fine. You’re strong and you’re beautiful.’
Caitlyn simply nodded as the she felt the tears run down her cheek. She patted Tara’s arm and whispered in a barely audible tone ‘Thank you.’
Sam couldn’t hear the exchange between the two women. Nor did she want to, noticing that it was an intensely private moment.
Tara got up and returned to her fishing line, and she and Sam moved back a few more feet. Caitlyn was already sitting back from the shore line, so didn’t need to move.
Once again the silence hung in the air, and all the sounds of the mangroves seem to take on a life force of their own. The gently lapping of the water as it steadily wound its way up the bank, the soft wind rustling through the dry course leaves of the mangrove trees, and the distant cries of the birds that called the mangrove habitat their home.
After a few minutes, Sam realised she had a fish on her line, but instead of getting excited as she normally did, she simply pulled her line in. Tara came over when she had the fish up on the bank and congratulated her. ‘That’s a little Mangrove Jack you’ve got yourself there. It’s smaller than some others I’ve seen, but it’s still a keeper if you want it.’
‘Yeah, I might just keep it. Matt and I could have it for tea tonight.’
Sam insisted on getting the fish off the hook herself. Tara handed her a rag to make holding the fish down easier. It took some doing, but Sam managed to tackle the hook out of the fish’s mouth. After that, Tara took the fish a few more metres up the bank and expertly used her knife to kill the fish as quickly and humanely as possible. Then Sam was able to put it in a plastic bag and slot it away in her backpack. It had an insulated pocket in the front, making it ideal for keeping a small catch in.
Just as Sam threw her line back in, Caitlyn stood up and started winding her line in. ‘If you’ll excuse me, I think I’m going to head home now.’
Sam felt awful. ‘Caitlyn please don’t go. You only just got here. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.’
‘No, there’s no need for you to feel bad. I’ve spent the last few months pretending that nothing happened. If anything, this has been good for me to get myself to deal with what went on, instead of living in denial. I never would have truly dealt with it, if I continued on the way I was. So in a way, I should thank you.’ With that, Caitlyn picked up her backpack and put it back on. ‘I’ll catch up with you both soon.’
Sam didn’t know what to say, so she simply replied ‘Yep, see you soon.’ She still felt incredibly guilty.
But after saying goodbye to Caitlyn and giving her one last hug, Tara turned to Sam and smiled. ‘Don’t worry about Caitlyn. She’s going to be fine.’
‘I know, but I still feel rotten. I think I’ll take her a nice bunch of flowers or a bottle of wine.’
‘That’s a really thoughtful idea, but just leave it for today. I think Caitlyn will want some time to herself. That’s all she needs.’
‘When did you get so wise?’ Sam added quietly before they both settled in to do more fishing.
As the next hour went by, the tide proceeded to come in faster and faster. It seemed that they were moving progressively further back up the bank every five minutes now. But with the incoming tide, came the fish and soon both women were busy pulling fish in. Tara kept a little Speckled Emperor for herself, but the rest of the fish they released. At one stage, Sam pulled in a cat fish, and she let Tara take it off the hook and dispose of it. Tara warned her how they had barbs on their head that would cause excruciating pain if she touched one.
Before Sam knew it, Tara started packing her belongings up.
‘Hey, why are you packing up. Isn’t this what they call the fish being on-the-bite.’
‘Yep, they sure are on the bite. But if we don’t leave soon, we’ll be trapped here by the tide, and we’ll end up sitting in the mangrove trees to keep the water from our feet. This will all be covered in water in two hours time, right up into those mangroves. Then in another two hours, the water will be lapping at the entrance of the mangroves, where we normally come in.’
‘Wow, that’s hard to imagine, when the creek was almost empty not that long ago.’ Sam started to pack her backpack up.
Even now as the two women walked off the bank and into the mangroves, the trail was exceptionally muddy. Even Tara, with her experience in walking out on the trail, took a bit of extra care.
At the small creek crossing halfway out of the mangroves, the water was already fairly flowing in. The ladies had to walk knee deep through it to get out. Going up the other side, Sam managed to slip over and land flat the full length of her body. When she gathered herself up and got to the top of the steep bank, she looked down at herself. She was covered from head to toe in a thick layer of light grey mud.
Tara burst out laughing. ‘I’m sorry Sam. I’m not laughing at you, I promise. It’s just that you do look well and truly, mmm, what’s the word? ... Covered!’
Sam looked at herself again and burst out laughing too. She was laughing so hard she thought she was going to cry. When she eventually calmed down, she said ‘How could you not laugh? I look like some kind of mangrove monster. Matt won’t be able to recognise his own wife if he sees me like this.’
Sam attempted to use her hand to scrape the mud off herself, but with little success. Then Sam and Tara continued on their way. Every now again, one of them would let out a small giggle.
After picking their way through the wet path for a few minutes longer, Tara asked Sam ‘So do you and Matt plan to have kids eventually?’
Tara noticed that Sam briefly stopped, before carefully continuing along a particularly slippery part of the pathway. There were ankle deep puddles every few feet, and there was no way to avoid walking through them.
Sam’s mood was instantly sombre and the light heartedness they had been experiencing was gone.
‘I’m sorry.’ said Tara. ‘Did I say something wrong?’
Sam didn’t answer straight away, but then after heaving a big sigh, she cautiously replied. ‘Actually, I fell pregnant literally just after we got married.’ After another long pause where they navigated through another long muddy part of the trail, Sam went on. But she spoke so softly that Tara had to listen very carefully to hear her. She stopped again and looked blankly back along the path they just traversed as she spoke.
‘We lost the baby at seven months. It was a little boy. He was still born. Everything had been going so well, then, one night, I woke up with stomach cramps. I knew they weren’t contractions. Matt rushed me to the hospital. We kept telling ourselves it would be ok. But as soon as the doctor did a check-up, he told us straight away that there was no heartbeat. I begged the doctor to put me under, and do a caesarean, but he told me I had to deliver him normally.’
Sam stopped talking again. There was an eerie silence. This time there was no sounds to be heard around them, except when Sam took another step and there were long squelching noise as she pulled her feet out of the mud.
‘Hmmph, it must be a day for confessions from the past. Damn! What is it about this place that makes you tell your deepest secrets... Yeah, well, anyway, they ended up inducing me. It was the most painful experience I could have possibly imagined. And at the end of it all, I could see the baby. My god, he looked like Matt. They left the baby in view for a couple of minutes. The midwives kept telling me to say good bye to my son. But I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. After that, they took him away.’
The two women walked on in silence for another few minutes.
As they walked out of the mangroves, Sam eventually told Tara more. ‘After, we lost the baby, Matt and I went through a rough patch as we struggled to come to terms with what had happened. It was so hard at first. Every time I looked at Matt, all I could think of was the baby I lost. At one stage, I even started sleeping in a separate room at night. We did consider separating, but after all the criticism we had received for getting married so soon, we were determined to prove the cynics wrong, so we decided to try and make a go of it. We started with couples and grief counselling, then when Matt was offered the job in Broome, we thought it would be an ideal chance to start fresh. I must admit that I still haven’t reconciled myself totally with what happened. But I think I’m starting to get over it.’
Sam and Tara came out of the mangroves and walked out along Chapple street. They found a tap at Woody’s service station next to the old town jetty, and with a bit of effort, Sam managed to wash some of the mud off herself, although the water pressure was poor, so there was still a lot of slimy, dull grey mud left. ‘Let’s just hope no-one who knows me sees me on the way home.’ She laughed, but it was very half hearted.
Sam and Tara then continued through the back streets of china town, then back to their road. They barely spoke all the way to Sam’s front gate. They both walked through the gate, and Sam grabbed the hose and turned it on. Tara patiently waited as Sam washed enough mud off herself so that she could at least walk inside without dirtying the floor. Then Tara washed the mud off her feet and legs.
As they washed, Tara asked Sam if she had heard from her mother.
‘Nope, I’m afraid not. I’ve written to her and sent her all my new contact details here in Broome, but I haven’t had a letter or a phone call or anything...’ Sam shook her head. ‘You know, Matt contacted my mother after I lost the baby and let her know what happened. Even then she didn’t come to see me. I guess she’s still punishing me for marrying Matt without her blessing.’
Tara said gently. ‘You probably don’t believe this, but I know in my heart you won’t stay estranged from your mother. My own daughter Emily has moved to Darwin, but she is the most precious thing in the world to me. There is no way your mother will stay away forever. She’ll come around, you’ll see.’
‘I won’t hold my breath.’ replied Sam with a hint of bitterness, as she went to turn off the hose. She brightened up slightly as she bid Tara goodbye. ‘Thanks for the fishing trip, despite all the revelations of the day, it’s been good. You wouldn’t think it, but fishing is so relaxing. I’ll see you soon.’
‘Yes, see you soon.’ Sam went to walk up the steps onto the veranda, but Tara gently caught her by the forearm. ‘Sam. You know, you’ve come to the right place.’
Sam looked at her quizzingly.
‘The local Indigenous people call Broome a place of healing, and I believe in that. This place has a certain magic about it. Time helps heal wounds, and Broome will too, but only if you let it.’
Then she went on her way without another word, but Sam could still feel a pleasant warm sensation on her arm where Tara had held her.